she said my sails are flapping in the wind

singin in the major key

Wed, 16 Dec 2009 12:22:07 GMT

Facebook just asked me would Jesus prefer socialism or capitalism. I say capitalism because he was a Jew.

So. I found out today what I already suspected, and that is that my foot is regressing rapidly and that I will soon be giving up on my walking days. The outcome of a "few years" didn't even become "a few months".

I'm pretty much at the point where ... where I want to just cling to everyone around me, but I feel pretty alone most of the time. I usually like that, that I am strong enough to face everything on my own, that I PREFER that, but this time I just wish someone in my life cared enough for me to cry to and be angry at the world for a bit.

Who even reads my LJ anymore, seriously. When did I become this pathetic, crying person, anyway? Wave if you're still here, haha. Unless you just follow my LJ for downloads and what not, in which case, go away. I'm a person, not a resource!

Actually, I should really do a friends cut. I am liking the idea of friends lately! Internet friendships are ~real, damnit!

donut know any japanese

Tue, 15 Dec 2009 07:33:20 GMT

I'm sorry, I'm wading through a backlog of emails and comments but I need to take a break for awhile! I've been having a bit of a week. While I was in Sydney, my sister crashed my car and so now I don't have a car anymore. And seeing as how I accidentally smashed my phone, the only person I talk to anymore is my mother and ocassionally my sister, whose social life hasn't diminished despite my car (her transportation) being wrecked. So I decided to zone out and talk to no one for a few days, ahaha. Coping mechasnisms and I, what great friends we are!

There's a serious joke in there, involving a toilet, my cat and a frog that is just dying to be told. Let's just say that my mother had an unpleasant surprise when she went to the bathroom this morning. (reposoir, if you don't find this funny ... ;D)

I pretty much fail right now and having anything to say. I am sand and wind and a shitty mirage, or something like that.

SO. I thought I'd celebrate the release of Rikkaimyu by sharing a few things I managed to ahem, sneakily get this year. However, I won't tell you what they are ;D!!! They're only audio, tho. Try and guess who's singing them!

1. skip forward to 40sec!
2. missed the beginning
3. skip forward to 1min! (though the name of this song kind of gives it away ... XD)

Donut care what people do with these, soon we'll have the real thing!!!!

Man, I miss Japan and the ~good times. Copying what reposoir said, anyone willing to pick me up Rikkaimyu 2 goods? Will of course pay extra to cover your efforts.

you put me in the magic position

Thu, 10 Dec 2009 12:15:38 GMT

I touched Patrick Wolf

I touched Patrick Wolf

I touched Patrick Wolf

Just got home and have shiny new computer and working internet! Gosh, so many things to ~share, but mostly oh my goodness love to all the shiny things on my profile.

I don't want to be one of those ~what have I missed people but

WHAT HAVE I MISSED???

Sing like a choir with no taste for the wine

Mon, 23 Nov 2009 09:34:14 GMT

1. I say this all the time, and I'll say it again: Roger and Nadal are BFFs. They were training tennis together! Nadal is always so cute every time he mentions Feds, he calls him Roger.

Be still my heart, nothing like epic men friendships to make me happy. That is exactly why Skins is my favourite teen drama ever. Being British automatically makes it better than everything else, but the male friendships are handled so well. There's always that undercurrent of sexual tension, even while they have hot ass girlfriends and love them.

Also, I just marathoned all three seasons of Skins, so that is probably why I'm on such a high kick.

2. I've been really ill lately, not at all helped by this amazing feat of being bitten by an insect on my lip:

Isn't it epic?

Not at all helped by the weather's inability to drop below 30oC even at night. 85% humidity and temperatures always over 35oC every day and it's not even summer yet.

3. I got $1000 in the bank on Friday, due to flood damages. But this wasn't physical damages, oh no. This was for emotional hardship. Um. Well, being stuck in the back seat of my car with my mother probably constitutes that so I will take it with a huge grin on my face!

4. I made spinach and cheese enchiladas with a spicy sauce and chocolate mousse just for a bit of fun last week. I sat the glasses in the door of the fridge and forgot they were there, opened the fridge door and all three glasses smashed all over my feet. So I went to the supermarket and bought this delicious Skinny Cow berry chocolate cups. Now I will never know if my invented chocolate mousse recipe was any good!

5. Remind me soon to tell you all about my plans to become a social worker. I think it's a good move. There's a solid career path afterwards and given my ~life story, it's quite fitting really.

6. Ahem, Yuichi admits to being gay and reveals his big gay love for Hiromi. I kid you not. And then he talks about wanting sleepovers with Takkun.

HAVE WE ALL UNDERESTIMATED HIM? Maybe his cosplaying of Hard Gay was his coming out. I always assumed his love confessions were him being overexcited for his male friends, but I think that the bumbling idiot played me. Well I never!

Also, is there anyone on my flist who hasn't seen Yuichi's Hard Gay cosplay? Cause really. It is the greatest thing I've ever seen.

7. Was thinking I should do a Christmas card post, but I still have my stack of cards from last year that never got posted. Whoops.

8. Leave me a comment saying "Ouji is a Skinny Cow"
I'll respond by asking you five questions so I can get to know you better!
Update your journal with the answers to the questions.
Include this explanation in the post and offer to ask other people questions.

Taken from llamachan <3

1) Think back to Amesuta. Uh-oh, power outage! What do you do?

Um, FLAIL AND DIE? No actually, I've missed a few lately due to family stuff and it always GUTS me.

2) Ouji, Ito, and Yuichi get into a fight. Who would win?

Yuichi played baseball (a bit dim witted) Ouji skateboards (deft) and well Ito? He seems a bit too academic. So Ito runs away and hides, Yuichi charges and Ouji moves out of the way. Yuichi runs head first into a brick wall so Ouji wins by default.

3) Cutest animal in this video?

THE ALBINO HEDGEHOG

4) What would you do with millions of dollars?

Move to Japan for a bit and get a house where kurayamihimitsu and I would have Good Times and anyone else who needed somewhere to crash would always be welcome.

5) Where do you want to be in five years?

Finishing my bloody Social Work degree, have traveled to Vietnam+Cambodia+Laos, have had sex with three people and preferably living in Brighton.

This entry is massively long. I have a fever in the heat. It's quite giddy inducing!

you just haven't seen my good side yet

Wed, 18 Nov 2009 08:03:29 GMT

I finally got the emo hair I've always wanted. Hopefully it'll cut itself and save me some $$$

(also, thanks guys for your opinions on the dresses! Majority rules so I'll probably go A!)

how are things on the west coast? today my heart swings

Wed, 11 Nov 2009 07:34:25 GMT

Okay, okay I am writing this like, post of doom that will be awesome. I have a list with lots of points with great things to talk about, except after seeing a diseased car filled with mould and insects I have lost all motivation to finish it. Also, a cashier (male) talked to me about my tampon usage in relation to my size. Make the connection yourself. RL trolling!

instead, instead !

1. IF YOU COULD BUILD A SECOND HOUSE ANYWHERE, WHERE WOULD IT BE?

2. WHAT ARE YOUR FAVOURITE ARTICLES OF CLOTHING?

3. THE LAST CDs YOU BOUGHT/DOWNLOADED?

4. WHAT TIME DO YOU WAKE UP IN THE MORNING?.

5. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE KITCHEN APPLIANCE?

6. IF YOU COULD PLAY AN INSTRUMENT, WHAT WOULD IT BE?

7. FAVOURITE COLOUR?

8. WHICH VEHICLE DO YOU PREFER, SPORTS CAR, MOTORCYCLE, OR SUV?

9. DO YOU BELIEVE IN THE AFTERLIFE?

10. FAVORITE CHILDREN'S BOOK?

11. WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE SEASON?

12. IF YOU HAVE A TATTOO, WHAT IS IT?

13. IF YOU COULD HAVE ONE SUPERPOWER, WHAT WOULD IT BE?

14. CAN YOU JUGGLE?

15. ONE PERSON/PEOPLE FROM YOUR PAST YOU WISH YOU COULD GO BACK AND TALK TO

16. WHAT IS UNDER YOUR BED?

17. WHAT IS YOUR FAVORITE DAY?

18. WHICH DO YOU PREFER, SUSHI OR HAMBURGERS?

19. FROM THE PEOPLE WHO NORMALLY READ YOUR BLOG, WHO IS THE MOST LIKELY TO RESPOND FIRST?

20. IF YOU DON'T CHECK YOUR FLIST, WHICH LJs DO YOU CHECK FIRST?

21. WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE FLOWER?

23. WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE MEAL?

24. DESCRIBE YOUR PJS.

25. WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE BREAKFAST?

26. DO YOU LIKE YOUR JOB?

27. WHAT IS YOUR DREAM JOB?

28. WHAT AGE DO YOU PLAN TO RETIRE?

29. WHERE DID YOU MEET YOUR SPOUSE OR SIGNIFICANT OTHER? OR, WANT TO ONLINE DATE ME? (desperate)

30. SOMETHING YOU WOULD LIKE TO DO THAT YOU HAVE NEVER DONE BEFORE.

LOL greatest meme answer. Answer, benches!

I had a huge surprise when I got some more comments on my anon confessional post. I think they might all be the same person (?) but oh my gosh, people should keep replying. This is my favourite post ever. Also, thanks for the ice cream pictures, whoever posted them. I um, don't get it, but okay!

so I'll be out until the shimmering dies

Sun, 08 Nov 2009 23:58:44 GMT

sdhgosigi guys

the power hasn't been on much at all over the last few days because I'm living in a complete flood zone that was declared a natural disaster on Saturday ahaha

1) my mum sank her car and nearly drowned but was pulled to safety by the SES
2) so her car kind of FLOATED away and was recovered down the river
3) we got stuck in epic flood waters on the highway in my car some 10 hours later with about 15 other cars and we all had to reverse and go up this hill, directed by about five police officers
4) we got the last room in a dingy hotel and holed up there for a day because we couldn't get home
5) then when we did get home we got flooded in for two days -- we got 18 inches of rain in 12 hours
6) the power was off for most of it lmao I've been so booored

but yeah, I think things will get fixed a bit up today, the rain seems to be letting up a bit.

this haha basically says all that. Want to find pictures but my internet is capped. Anyway <33, should be back online proper soon. Gotta turn the internet back off in case the power shorts and then it'll destroy the modem.

fuck me and make me a drink

Wed, 04 Nov 2009 07:42:05 GMT

Yesterday wasn't meant to be ~emo, so much as I have more fun at facebook, haha.

Had a great therapy session today. I have such a crush on her that I'm thinking I need to change therapists. I have this habit of starting to see someone and then the moment things get comfortable, I don't feel like I want to ruin what they think of me so I stop seeing them until things get so pressing I see someone else. But I'm really into Faye and she is still actually being supervised while she sees me. She's only 25 and yeah, while I can't open up to guys, I never actually want to ask them out for a drink after I tell them about my mother's suicidal problem haha.

If I put these two things up against each other:

and

I need to start seeing things in perspective. This year hasn't been defined by failure and expectations but rather in meeting my two biggest Japanese celebrity crushes, one of them even telling me that he loved me. This is a positive point, and if I use it as a point to dwell on and push myself forward, so be it, yeah? I'm not much for LJ right now. Once I start unloading here, I won't stop, and I don't want to be ~that person, you know, the one that overshares and embarrasses themselves with too much ~feeling. Once I get back into the real world and out of my bubble, and I have ~people and a ~life, things will be better and easier. I don't know, I'm looking for astronauts. I'm trying to pass the time by reading a lot. It's what I always do. Hahahaha, oh my life.

And urgh, I just can't relate to anyone right now. Or carry out proper conversations because I get distracted and turn some music on and block out whatever I going to say.

But I have bright orange nails and I'm going to a big party tomorrow, so. I have a new dress, it is pretty.

heee

Tue, 03 Nov 2009 09:04:43 GMT

my facebook
or email - ohartemis@gmail.com

:)

walk the fleet road

Sat, 31 Oct 2009 12:01:03 GMT

um, lol whut????

yes, I understand completely.

(I am a twitterbug it is true, you can add me @towersofbig if you want, but I am kind of lame on there)

MY LIFE PASSION

shut up reposoir and kurayamihimitsu, you have no say in this matter!!!

the weirdest thing is that today I was hanging out at ontd_ai and amusing myself not being in a Japanese fandom for a little while. It was refreshing.

I am so out of sorts, please be posting me random things about yourself to distract me from my life :))

PS: and in case you were wondering about yesterday, OUJI DATES CHICKS WITH DICKS. That was Ito!

OH SNAP I JUST BOUGHT PATRICK WOLF TICKETS
OR MAYBE JUST TICKET BECAUSE I HAVE NO FRIENDS SO I AM GOING ON MY OWN HAHAHA

becoming more like Alfie

Mon, 26 Oct 2009 11:59:55 GMT

l'absinthe

This is one of my all time favourite paintings (I thought that the naked bath paintings might be a bit much to post here though haha). In fact, Degas is one of my favourite artists, up there with Edward Hopper and van Gogh. Everyone always expects me to be an Escher fan but if it's not an oil painting or ukiyoe the only real art I can get is Dali, haha. Anyway, I thought this might be an opportunity for people to geek out and share with me some pictures of their favourite artists! It doesn't necessarily have to be something retarded like I like, it could be in photography or animation or whatever interests you. Failing this, post a picture of someone devastatingly attractive and I'll be just as happy.

(Did I ever mention how much I geeked out in Japan and bought a beautiful 1821 ukiyoe original that I've been trying to buy a frame for? It's fucking gorgeous)

sleeping boys get no fish

Fri, 23 Oct 2009 06:41:42 GMT

WIGGLER

all these things that i've done.

Wed, 21 Oct 2009 11:47:58 GMT

working really hard with physio & as such I am really exhausted all the time. quote me song lyrics and spam me baby animal pictures (I have a penchant for otters at the moment) so~

anon meme.

(special points for farmville references .....)

good bad right wrong

Mon, 19 Oct 2009 09:19:56 GMT

i'm gonna be a mighty king so enemies beware!!!

ahahahaha

Can't Stop the FORWARD FEET

Sun, 18 Oct 2009 08:29:59 GMT

I'm wearing FLAT NORMAL SHOES ........

I am literally dying of happiness right now. Today I went out without a walking stick. And walked around. It was amazing, I can't even. I mean, my foot hurts like a mother fucker and I'm working really hard trying to strengthen it and it's a slow process but before it was maybe 10 steps of no walking stick. Now I can go for a few minutes and I feel like the claustrophobia that was clutching me before is loosening its hold just a little.

THEREFORE STUPID POLL.

View Poll: Independent Woman

today is a good day to flex the muscles of the weary

Fri, 16 Oct 2009 05:08:50 GMT

so I have been listening to this band called Cloud Cult that is kind of a mix between The Polyphonic Spree, Tapes n Tapes and Gogol Bordello. Which actually, is a strange mix. It's been over 12 months since I've had real life friends to push music onto! I cut my iTunes back to 6000 today. I love doing that, I always find old gems that I haven't listened to in ages. I am not a huge fan of Daft Punk, in fact I don't like them much at all, but I feel that if I deleted them that somehow Gabby would find out and smite me from Sydney.

anyway, no one cares about my retard music talk haha. I need m3p3 to run again! boho, you still run that right? :D? :D? I will hopefully find someone who will listen to Italian orphan boy pop.

lol am frog baby! there are actually no baby pictures of me in my house, but my grandmother photocopied some for me. My mother didn't take any hahaha

more photocopies! me pushing my older sister on that bike was veeery common

I used to do this type of dance thing where you had to walk on your toes (very good for me, seeing as how that is how I walk naturally) and because I was allergic to the tanning lotion I had to wear these tanned stockings D:

lol four things I remember well from my teenage years! piano, hockey, going to Vietnam and my gothic phase :|

Haha, I always tell people how awkward I was until I spread my wings and left the coup. But that's okay, because I am hot stuff now hahahaha. I was going to take a picture of my closet, but then I though I should probably er, clean it up first. My sister hid some alcohol in there and everything is EVERYWHERE.

I also feel bad that I haven't talked much about Masa lately, so here is a clip of Sun Will Shine Away from the PatiNight DVD, where he was wearing the infamous yellow pants! Feel free to share the link around, reupload it, do whatever.

Hope everyone is fantastic, I am feeling pretty good today! I mean, the internet is restarting tomorrow and for anyone who knew me before February when I gave up walking, I AM BACK BIKE RIDING. I did 20 minutes today of no resistance riding and then half an hour of light swimming. Oh my god, I'm so excited that I'm allowed to do this again. I'm absolutely exhausted but I feel GREAT. I made myself a giant banana and apple smoothie and ate a bowl of peaches and half a box of cereal to try and boost my energy and it totally WORKED.

maybe that's what it takes

Wed, 14 Oct 2009 11:42:04 GMT

Lol, I think half the population of moths are down my bra.

Discuss.

we only stayed together for the kids

Sat, 10 Oct 2009 08:25:19 GMT

View Poll: SALLY SHOULD .......

FUCK YEAH

Hasn't he grown sodghsdiog oh my baby, be still my heart.

So, my email isn't working haha. y!m is sporadically working, which is just FANTASTIC. Blah.

Therefore! GAMES.

1. Ask me to take a picture of anything, be it real life or on my computer.

and/or

2. Comment and I will upload a song by an artist that has the same letter as your username and/or real name.

and/or

3. MORE CONFESSIONS PLEASE

What are people's thoughts for a name mine and inarkami's and kyraensui's translation journal? :D?

ps: I'm really down at the moment, completely unrelated to recent death. I don't know what to do right now, haha. Mi sono immaginato tutto quanto ...

you will remember me most by my funeral and all the beautiful toasts

Tue, 29 Sep 2009 11:26:02 GMT

well, after all that anon fun, I thought I'd play my favourite

10 things to say to 10 people!

1. you getting a life has really put a hindrance in my socialisation!!!
2. sometimes you are my only connection to the real world, haha
3. I HAVE SOMETHING EXCITING TO TELL YOU ...... well, not exciting so much as wtf, but I'm sure you'll appreciate it :D
4. re: your confessional. Wow :x :x :x That's really ... yeah, intense.
5. :|
6. I wish that we could talk mooooore
7. Your life fills me with such lolz!!!! You rate yourself way to high in your importance in people's lives.
8. <333
9. Your imbalance makes me laugh
10. I am hot for you, baby

Well, really this is just an excuse for me to post a VIDEO CONFESSIONAL in the way that it's not. It took over an hour for this to upload!!! Sorry that I look so gross, I was just feeling exceedingly bored and a little by the way side. There are no redeeming factors here.

havana gang brawl

Mon, 28 Sep 2009 10:08:25 GMT

~ SO! In this day of days I am just not going to get into my real life. Today ... well. It was amazing in how bad it was. I've been writing a lot lately in my real life filter, if you want to listen to me whine, just ask, haha.

I am lamely listening to The Killers. I blame Kris Allen.

yukimura is awesome and making me icons. It makes me happy, these random acts of kindness. I wish I could just, you know, spontaneously somehow do nice things for people when they were down, ahha.

None on my messenger programs are working. My internet is capped again, speeds of 0.6kbs are not cooperative with my recovery! No one seems to be talking to me ANYWAY. I'm sorry for my emo self! I loved everyone's confessionals. People should always go back and keep writing them! I tried not to put a name to the anon part, but I also liked people who didn't bother with anonymity.

My confession: Ever since I saw Takkun rocking out on the guitar, I've been unable to think about anything else.

Another one: I may have honestly squealed out loud at Yuichi's self movie with Cheryl.

Oh, and again: Whenever Yuichi draps himself across Hiromi, I feel warm fuzzies.

Lastly: Baba, Ito-kyun and Yuichi should always hang out.

I need to make a fandom post, damnit.

How's everyone else going? Anyone going anywhere exciting for Christmas? I'm going to Sydney next weekend! Not really Christmas, but still!

ps: Masa wrote the most beautiful post ever regarding Kane's influenza. I crush so hard on him sometimes.

I have lusted after you.

Fri, 25 Sep 2009 09:46:58 GMT

♥__♥

Thanks guys for these! They've been GREAT. Sometimes I can pick who they are, but for the most part I am just feeling buzzed at the random fun times. You don't need to apologise if you say something bad about me/someone else :)) That's the point of the confessionals! I'd LOVE if people would keep them coming! I've spent half the day on oxygen at the hospital (funny, FUNNY story) so I want to bring that buzzed feeling back! Alternatively, comment anonymously on this post saying something random about yourself and I will try and guess who it is!

<3~

(you know, I've been sitting in wait for something for a few days and it hasn't gone down yet. I'm wondering if it will sdgis I need some sort of open anon meme somewhere to vent)

self-portrait with thing

Thu, 24 Sep 2009 12:30:14 GMT

please be answering this poll if you are interesting in the PureBOYS! Inquiring minds want to know ;D

So, y!m isn't working right now and it's making me tragic sad. Therefore I thought!

ANON CONFESSIONALS

Share your secrets!!! They don't have to be about me at all, but spill something that is either weighing on you or something you want to say to someone but can't find the way.

just because!!!!

eta: comments screened :))

let's live like we're dying

Tue, 22 Sep 2009 00:00:00 GMT

Discuss.

lol

Sun, 20 Sep 2009 00:50:55 GMT

I think I'm finally coming out of my drug induced haze. Apparently the surgery went extremely well. No walking at all for 10 days though I will get a walker to help me get to the bathroom and kitchen on Monday.

Also. Seat in the shower.

Does anyone want pics of my really fat ankle? The Doctor thought it would be funny to write

PS: ---->

on my leg just to let me know which leg got operated on.

♥~ Thanks guys for all the well wishes! And ILU apricotflower for your txts. You're living the high life baby ;)

also also, I wrote Jill the most amazing poem ever last night:

help i have no brain
slept on the bathroom floor
until I realised i have a voice
to call my sister to help
me back to bed

because there is nothing funnier than that!!!!

ETA: and for people who are smarter than me, is there any way to order things from Studio Warp without using a deputy service? In which I mean, do places usually pick Studio Warp photobooks up?

your yoga instructor is black

Thu, 17 Sep 2009 10:58:34 GMT

Amesuta was almost entirely Pigg

oh my god

crying with laughter.

Takkun was gambatte-ing to get everyone into the picture .....
Yuichi was groping him with excitement to omg plz get them all in the picture Takkun ....
Andrew was crikey-ing in glee ...
Ouji was giggling to himself ....
Miura was sitting in the corner like a little violet waiting to be deflowered
Ito-kun was bemusedly watching over his flock
Kei-chan was wanting to shut the computer down

Liv Sz.: omg Miura/Ouji DO NOT WANT
Sally Renee: omg you know you ship it
Liv Sz.: what about Kei-chan's and Ouji's illicit BL??
Sally Renee: Kei-chan cheated on Ouji with Hiromi's rapeface remember
Liv Sz.: oh right! kei-chan, you whore!

yeah.

(HAHA LIV I COPIED THIS IN)

Andrew is one sexy beast btw. A sexy beast who now writes his name in kanji. At first I thought that Yuichi had named him, but sadly that lol didn't last long when I realised it was official.

lololol

I LOVE MY FANDOM, GUYS
I WANT TO MAKE A PUREBOYS LOVE POST ON THE COMM

*does so ...*

Last post before my walking is taken away! If you feel generous, SPAM THIS POST PLZ, so I have something to read/entertain myself when I get back! Thanks for all the well wishes, I'm hoping that this will be a big step in the right direction.